I am Not A Runner , I am Not A Runner, I am Not A Runner… Anymore….
And so after over 25 years of enjoying running and exploring many islands, territories, woods, cities and towns I lost part of my identity today. It hurts and I feel devastated. I sort of suspected something was amiss back in April when after a run in the USVI’s my knee was feeling sore and this pain lingered for weeks.
The pain continued throughout the next few months and islands and was exasperated once returning to the hills at Mabel Lake. Excited after some progress made with physiotherapy for 6 weeks… but then another devastating blow after a seamless return to running… things were just. not. right. And so began the wait for an MRI.
In the meantime I took it easy and rested thinking this too would pass…. and we began plans for our next journey. In between the chaos of camp, company, work in Vancouver and community fun, we applied for several long term house/pet sits worldwide and are getting excited about the possibilities of travel once more…just no running!
And today the MRI results which indicate in addition to arthritis, there is a tear in both the MCL and ACL that will require surgery. And so, I wait… the list to see an orthopedic surgeon is between 8 weeks and 8 months.
And so today I mourn the part of me that lives to run, to enjoy the freedom to explore and pass through scenery with an accelerated heart beat, to return home feeling exhilarated and fulfilled. There is nothing like it. I have told Glen I need a day to have a “pity me” party….what will I do, if not run? where can we explore nearby? how will our adventures continue? and tomorrow I will pull up my “not running socks” and then we will make new plans and adventures for the short term until I can get put back together again. For in all of this I pause and realize how blessed we are….. in perspective this is just small stuff… so I give thanks and appreciation for all those trails that I have covered and am confident that I will find something to fill this void.